Gymrat\’s Weblog

News from the world of muscle

The science of Floyd Landis’s failed drug test

In his blog Pure Pedantry Jake Young posts a lengthy, but worthwhile, look at the science of Floyd Landis’s failed drug test in the post “Floyd Landis and Testosterone Testing: All the Background You Want and Need“:

“I thought I would do some research and clarify some of the medicine behind this because the science of how we detect anabolic steroid use is often a litte obscure.”

In an post yesterday, Floyd Landis is Busted, the latest news is referenced:

“Anyway, it turns out my man Floyd is busted — he failed the isotope test:

Tests performed on Floyd Landis’s initial urine sample showed that some of the testosterone in Landis’s body came from an external source and was not naturally produced by his own system.””

If only Floyd had read the Newspaper Morgan County Citizen. They posted a list of things male athletes can do to safely and quickly reduce the level of testosterone in their bodies:

  • “Buy Carol King’s “Tapestry” album. Listen to it all the way through. Sing along to “Natural Woman.” You know you want to.
  • Football practice overloads your testosterone. To keep it in check, every once in a while, look over at the guy next to you on the line and, with all sincerity, say, “Do these hip pads make my butt look big?”
  • Wear pink. You probably are already. That latest fashion craze in men lowers testosterone by 20 percent. Levels go down by 5 percent just by hanging one in the closet.
  • Put some product in your hair. This works in a couple of ways because along with spending entirely too much time with your hair in the morning, each time you obsessively check it in a mirror later in the day (like it’s going anywhere) your testosterone level stabilizes.
  • Rent “The Notebook.” Watch it with several women. Take the cue and when they cry, you cry.”

Millions Of Americans Buying Floyd Landis-Inspired Bracelets


August 2, 2006 - Posted by | Doping, Humor

1 Comment »

  1. Good stuff in today’s post. Very informational! I didn’t realize that it was detected that Landis had snthetics in him. It’s always interesting to see how athletes squirm whenit’s discovered that they are cheats! Like Bonds and McGuire….Now Landis. It’s really a shame ….

    Comment by Ed | August 2, 2006 | Reply

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